So go on, say goodbye
So many questions but I don’t ask why
So this time I won’t even try
Hush hush now
When I try to forget you
I just keep on remembering
What we had was so true
But somewhere we lost everything
|—||Thomm Quackenbush, We Shadows|
For some reason, I remembered my ex, and then I started to cry. I should be over him, what’s wrong with me? :( I just want to find a nice girl, or guy who I won’t have to worry about cheating on me, and who can take care of me and make me enjoy living a bit more. I want to be satisfied alone, but I can’t be happy whenever I can’t even support myself. I wish life could be a bit more easy, but I know that there are people who have it far worse than I have it, so why do I complain so much? Why can’t I just be happy about what I have?
Why do our feelings have to seem so strong when we’re so small and insignificant, living in such an infinitely-growing universe?
Life’s too short to even care at all, oh
I’m losing my mind losing my mind losing control, oh oh
If I could find a way to see this straight
I’d run away
To some fortune that I, I should have found by now
So I run now to the things they said could restore me
Restore life the way it should be
I’m waiting for this cough syrup to come down
Dear person I had a crush on,
You’ve helped me change quite a bit, and I feel like a better person since I’ve met you. However, I feel like you’re being indecisive on how you really feel about me and where you see us in our relationship. I’ve decided that these changes that I’ve been making in my habits and in my life are no longer to have you, but to better myself for myself. I do wish you could be honest with me about how you truly feel. I promise that whatever you tell me, whether good, sad, or bad, I won’t cry or make you feel uncomfortable. I’m able to handle myself in similar situations, and I’d rather be told a truth that may hurt, than hope for something that isn’t going to happen. Even if you couldn’t see us being together, I feel like I’ve found a friend for life.
This was a letter I wrote to my ex-fiance. Afterwards, we did get back together, but I had to end it officially on the 13th of this month because I could no longer trust him, and there were other issues… I wish I’d read this letter before getting back with him, I feel like others can learn from it. We had been together for 5 years.
December 18, 2012 - 4:37AM
I can’t find the right mind to speak to you over the phone, nor the right words. I guess all I can really say is that I’m sad that things didn’t work out the way I’d planned. Maybe you’re right though, maybe we really are just way too different for one another for it all to work out. I guess the reason it hurts so bad is because I truly did love you, and I’d figured that despite any differences we had, our love we had for each other could help make things work between us. I see now that you no longer feel this way for me anymore, and sadly, I can’t say I feel like I’d ever be able to fully trust you again. Perhaps it’s for the best that we part ways. I think you should know, that despite everything that happened, you were still a huge part of my life. (We were together for almost 1/5th of my life after all!) And even though we will no longer be seeing each other, I feel like you’ve helped me grow to become a better person. I guess I feel almost invincible now to be able to go through what might be the one biggest fear I once had in life. This might sound crazy, but I honestly wish you the best in life and hope that in time, you can be truly happy. Goodbye, Michel.
ps: You might want to look into getting that tattoo removed from your arm.